About Nicole Ivelevitch
Nicole Ivelevitch (she/her) is a licensed social worker who specializes in working with individuals with body image concerns, disordered eating, anxiety disorders, and more. She currently sees clients in NY, NJ, and FL and is also the Practice Manager for Collaborative Minds Psychotherapy LLC.
What were some of the pivotal moments in your personal journey that shaped the way you approach body image and eating disorder recovery as a therapist?
As a therapist, I think something that was crucial to my own recovery and did create a lot of pivotal moments for me were having therapists and other professionals on my team who were recovered themselves. I was able to look up to them and learn from them and also just see that I wasn't special or alone in being sick because my eating disorder had convinced me that I was, you know, I thought that nobody could ever possibly understand what I was going through or how exactly I was feeling. And then I had these professionals, these, you know, successful people showing me like, oh no, they did. So I think this also really influenced my own decision to become a therapist myself.
And I think having been on the other side of recovery really helps me to approach my clients with a different level of empathy and understanding that I might not have had otherwise. It's really hard to understand something like that if you've never actually been there. Not that I would say it's impossible, but it definitely does give a different level of insight, I think.
What role did seeking help or support play in your own healing process, and how does that influence the way you encourage clients to seek support?
So I think like most people struggling with an eating disorder, I actually didn't seek out, or even want help at the beginning of my healing process. So that influences how I encourage my own clients to show up to therapy and to seek out support on their own. I think that being able to acknowledge that at some level the eating disorder most likely developed to serve some kind of purpose. So there's a level of comfort in that, and it's really important to put that out there in building trust and a sense of safety in the therapeutic relationship. So I do try to meet them where they're at and go from there.
How has your relationship with your body evolved over time, and how do you continue to nurture that relationship today?
When I was younger, I always viewed my body as a problem that needed to be fixed. And through recovery, I really started to appreciate everything my body actually does for me. And. And especially now that I'm a mom, I'm really in a place where I view my body as more of a machine than a decoration. I'm a little. Actually more than halfway through my third pregnancy now, so I do a lot of checking in with myself and try to give myself grace, especially if I'm craving something specific or if I feel like I need extra rest.
Congratulations on your big news! Pregnancy brings so many changes to the body—physically, emotionally, and mentally. How are you navigating this new chapter, and what practices help you stay grounded in a positive body image?
This time around, I've actually been much more mindful about noticing when negative thoughts about my body do start to creep in. And what helps me the most is to kind of like, take a step back from myself and approach the negative thoughts with neutrality and curiosity rather than judgment and reactivity. So kind of like watching the thoughts pass by and being like, oh, that's interesting. I wonder where that's coming from. Instead of attaching feelings to them and then letting them ruin my day.
Are there any exercises or techniques you suggest to help regulate emotions when they feel triggered by body image or eating challenges?
If detaching from the thoughts isn't realistic or something that other people find easy to do, I usually recommend using the Five Senses Grounding technique from dbt. So you identify five things you can see, four things you can feel, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and then one thing you can taste. So this can be really helpful for bringing you back to the present moment. And you can do it basically anywhere without drawing attention to yourself.
How do you hold space for both the gratitude and the complex emotions that can arise when your body is changing, whether from pregnancy or recovery?
So I think even for people who don't struggle with eating disorders, there is a grieving process involved in becoming a mom. Because you're losing the life and the body that you once had, you will never be the same again, and you're allowed to feel sad about that. So, personally, I always knew that I wanted to become a mom. And that was actually one of the things that finally pushed me towards recovery was being told that I might not be able to have children if I kept going down the path I was on. So I think it really comes down to practicing acceptance and reflecting on my own values. So I allow myself to feel frustrated or self conscious or sad or pissed off, but then I keep moving towards the life that aligns with my values.
For someone just starting their healing journey, what advice would you give them about embracing progress over perfection and showing themselves grace along the way?
I would just start by saying how important it really is to practice self compassion. Because especially in this day and age, it's literally impossible to escape all of the messages about how you should look, what you should eat, what exercises you should be doing, everything. So reminding yourself that recovery isn't linear, you need to practice forgiveness. You can forgive yourself if you make a mistake and give yourself permission to be human. And then you'll get there one day. It is possible.
